Archive for June, 2008

Really. Marissa thinks I hate her, though I’ve really just been keeping my distance because I think she’s making a horrible decision marrying Chris. I checked her myspace, and found this comment from someone who I used to think was a friend. (Way back when.)

Cate hating you will probably get easier to deal with. I wouldn’t know since i was the one who never really liked her. I know that sounds bad but i just didn’t like how she treated people. Pissed me off. I only hung around her because she was always around Emily.

Ok, really? She hung around me because of Emily… when Emily is the one that treats people like shit. Uses, abuses, and then disposes. I just don’t get it. How am I ALWAYS the bad guy? Tell me, do I really treat people that badly? Am I really such a horrible person that I drive everyone away? What is it about me that has my friends dropping like flies and me becoming more reclusive and depressed and apt to get drunk just to not care anymore?

I’m sick of caring about other people, but I can’t fucking help it. And why is it that people never let anything go? This girl making the comment still posts bulletins about how much she hates me, and how I’m the biggest annoyance in her life. I haven’t talked TO or ABOUT this girl for over 9 months, and she just CAN NOT let go.

I’m sorry that I have a conscience and that I’m unwilling to bullshit people. I’m so fucking sorry. But I’m really sick of this shit and I’m sick of feeling so bad about it. I can deal with not having “real” friends, if it means that I don’t have to deal with other people’s idiocy.

So fuck everyone who thinks I’m such a bad person. I just don’t give a shit anymore.

I know. I suck.
I’ve pretty much been working and hanging out at home. I know- exciting right?

Truth be told, I don’t have a lot of friends outside of the internet. I’m okay with that, really. But sometimes it makes for a life with no blog fodder. I don’t always feel like sitting here and trying to think up something to blog about when I’ve really just been hanging out with Branden watching him play MGS4. lol.

I’m hoping to save up some money and get Wii Fit soon, ’cause I tried it out at a friends the other night, and it was a lot of fun. Fun AND a good work out. lol. Had me sweatin’! We’re gonna see if they can buy it for us, because they work at a game store and get a great discount. (It would be $90 instead of $150) Hope hope hope! I really feel like Wii Fit would benefit me in the long run, so I’m trying to talk Branden into getting it. ‘Cause chica needs to lose weight. lol.

Ok. It’s almost 6 am, and I need to get some sleep. I’ve got to work at 5:30!